Pride and contentment

One of the hardest things to do is be proud of where you are TODAY while making goals for the future. One should always have a direction to go, but that doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy the road trip too.

I think it can be a trick of your own mind to be satisfied and content with your current state while making goals for the future. I can most liken it to school. You must take several classes in order to earn credit for the degree. You focus on the present classes, even the current assignment, while you are earning credits for the degree. You can be content, focused on the present, while making your way to your main goal. The trick is to not get bogged down in the work it takes to get there, be frustrated and upset about where you are at the moment.

Life can be this way too! Being grateful for what you have and where you are, while making forward progress goals for life. This concept incorporates some main ideas I have already discussed

 

Each of these ideas are what it takes to feel contentment about yourself and life while balancing future goals. Having goals keeps you moving in a positive direction, thwarts boredom and depression, though can cause anxiety if not balanced.

TRY THIS

In my family, and what I suggest to clients, is to create biannual goals. On or near New Year’s, since that is the “time” to make new goals, create a list of goals for yourself and family. You should include at least one goal for each area of your life. It can be as simple as “drink more water,” “meditate/pray daily,” or “family walks.” They should be simple, measurable and doable. A goal is something to reach for. Review these again in 6 months (4th of July) and see how you are doing. Have you accomplished it? Does it need to be revised? Make it work for you. I suggest also writing what you have accomplished, even if it wasn’t on the list, during that time. It counts! Be grateful for what you have done and examine what might be improved.

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Increase your happiness

I attended an amazing seminar on how to integrate positive thought and increase happiness. The first few hours were about the brain and it’s chemicals that “create” happiness, or lack thereof. Apparently, I need to learn more about the limbic system.

The presenter then cited several studies which demonstrated how particular behaviors can help one achieve happiness. For example, just proximity to happy people can impact your own happiness by about 5%. That would go up by how many people and how close a relationship you have with them.flower_smiley_face

Cool! Hang out with happy people! 

Toward the end he got to some good stuff about what kind of behaviors, thoughts and practices you can incorporate in your life to increase happiness. I thought I might share some with you.

 

 

Gratitude journal (Try This):

This includes a daily recount of good things that have happened to you that day. It might be easy to list things you are grateful for in general. Much like thoughtful and intentional prayer, you might recite those things you are glad for in your life, but have to think about particulars that day that are meaningful and brought you some joy. If you do pray, you can just write those things down in your gratitude journal after. If not, spend some serious time considering some events that brought you some joy that day, everyday. You can think of at least THREE. These should be things that are positive and specific to you. Not, “I did not die today” unless you were in a horrible accident and might have actually died, then you might say “I lived!” (see, positive).

Optimism:

Hey, I just covered this! He was talking about not only being positive about your personal possible future, seeing a good long term outcome, but other people too.  This optimism is about looking at your life in stages, seeing what good will come ahead, that things will always improve. You can also see that for others. Forgive them of their minor transgressions, like rudeness, forgetfulness or disregard. It will not hurt you, but only them, in the long run. Hold onto those things that will increase your happiness over time, like good friends, family, happy moments, health. Let go of those things that cause you pain, like anger, resentment and grief.  

Happiness is about finding those things in life that already make you happy, content and peaceful, holding onto them and searching them out. Let the good things rule over the bad. It is a matter of mind.